Openings and Opportunities Afforded by Self Confidence

Opportunity forms affinities much more easily and quickly with self-confidence than it does with egotism.

When You Know You Can
Self Confidence Has a Voice All Its Own

If you have Self-confidence those around you will discover this fact. Let them make the discovery. They will feel proud of their alertness in having made the discovery, and you will be free from the suspicion of egotism. Opportunity never stalks the person with a highly developed state of egotism, but brick-bats and ugly remarks do. Opportunity forms affinities much more easily and quickly with self-confidence than it does with egotism. Self-praise is never a proper measure of self-reliance. Bear this in mind and let your Self-confidence speak only through the tongue of constructive service rendered without fuss or flurry. ”    Napoleon Hill

Sometimes, you may want to wonder if some people are born leaders or positive thinkers. NO. Being positive and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing lines for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent.             David Elefant on

Self-confidence is one of those qualities we can fool ourselves about, and it’s not often talked about beyond the cursory, “yeah, I got it!”

Smiles All Around
Great Way to Gauge When Your Self-confidence is Robust







Voila!  Who knew?  When you’re comfortable enough to bring out your humor, that pretty much tells you your self-confidence is well-seated, does it not?

So many of our other qualities mesh well with self-confidence, too.  Being able to relax with yourself, being able to forget about yourself and focus on others, being able to produce quality work, feeling free to mingle and join in, unhesitating decision making.  I’m sure others are speeding through your brain as you read this.  Feel free to comment and share.

Like maybe every other thing about us, self-confidence has its ebbs and flows.  Sometimes it seems the worst possible time when we realize we are feeling doubt in ourselves.

I found myself recently creating a mantra for myself to stiffen my spine a little when that occurs.  As they say on Criminal Minds, “we all breathe the same air.”  Too, duly noted, we are all made from earth — on the same planet.  And, surely, we can all believe there’s at least one thing we can do that the folks around us can’t do, worthy of praise or no.

With those three pieces, under my belt, I find I can choose to go forth and offer a portion of myself in present company, and then turn my attention to others to see what they have to offer me.





I created this picture intending some kind of a description of myself, or to get out how I see myself at this point in my life.

From the third grade, I have been aware of how much I have desired to have a good man to be my partner.  I have attached “good” to my sense of my partner and laughed about it because the third grade boy who as far as I know never became aware two classmates had their eyes on his fair face and black hair, had Good as his last name.

I thought it interesting that when I saw the picture of the groom kissing the bride in the street/on the street, their apparel was so traditional.  I was never the girl to even think about the perfect gown or upswept hair.  I cared not a whit the flavor or appearance of the cake, and I barely managed to come up with a color scheme and why I chose the one I did, I may never know.  I had no desire to consider the entourage of best men and maidens.  But I did care about the affection, a man who wanted to kiss me more than to make the best sense of a moment.

When I described to my sister, over the phone, the picture I had made and asked her to remark on what she had picked up on from what I told her, she named off three things:  color and sectioned and the third doesn’t come to mind right now.  I picked up on her saying color because of course she didn’t see it.  I had described the Jerusalem soil extending three times the height of the bottom picture and that was what made here think of color in the picture.

What my eye was drawn to as I looked about for color was the family picture where the family was white cutout against deepening brown.

I saved the middle point of the picture to tell her about last and so had brought up the desert soil in the backdrop to the shepherd and the sheep and lambs he watched primarily from above.  My father had been a sheepherder nearly all of his teenage years.

As I write about this, I find I am reflecting on my father and what I consider to be elements of loneliness throughout his life.  Those reflections would be stories I make up.  My father would have been one of my great multitude of what I have come to view as “silent men”.  From my perspective, I could never gain satisfaction in discourse from the type of silent man I found my father to be.  It’s only recently that my pondering has allowed me to see there are many varieties of such men.

The family in the upper right corner are truly awhirl with meaning to me.  I AM immensely thankful for my families;  I speak of my family of origin, and I speak of the family wherein I had my two boys.  My having children has to have been along the lines (though I don’t understand it the way many people do) of “God’s grace”.  My best friend grew up in a family of eight children and her hot spot was always wanting children.  While I thought of the man I wanted, she thought of the children she wanted.  I never could have admitted it in the religion I was raised in, but I wasn’t totally sure I wanted children — until I had them.

When I found (in my perspective) my relationship (after nineteen years) was beyond my ability to tolerate longer, and managed to get myself to do the unthinkable and divorce, I managed to sever my ties to the individual I had always seen myself as being.  In secret, of course.

I wonder if you would take a minute and reflect back through your life.  Can you think of ever having done that?

Well, . . ., or maybe I should say so, . . . How well did you fare?  Have you ever seen yourself as a white paper cut out in stark relief on a brown, brown life?

Now, for the middle picture.  I’m well aware there are many women in our world today who are happy and fit and brilliant and contributing, based on a life from which they’ve drawn lessons and strength and love.  Kudos, kudos, kudos, from the bottom of my heart.

I believe I truly strive to be amongst just such women.  The one dimensional closed eyed untethered floating (or suspended) female paper doll seems more representational.

I’m truly curious to know if I am alone in feeling this way.


I appreciate the view of another commenter, Joan, who shared this remark — and it could apply to actually walking a labyrinth, as well, I’m sure: “It’s about slowing down, reflecting, being.” Simply reading that keyed me in to why I selected to read this piece, and ah, I’ve been well served.


Cretan Labyrinth Cretan Labyrinth

A book I read recently featured a labyrinth and I got to wondering about them. Here’s what I’ve learned. Although maze and labyrinth are often used interchangeably, there are distinctions for the purest. A labyrinth features a single, non-branching path leading to a center. Unlike a maze, the path of the labyrinth is not intended to be difficult or confusing. So no corn labyrinths for Halloween, please! Labyrinths have appeared in most cultures at some point or another across the globe. The designs have occurred on baskets, pottery, body art, caves, and churches. Their meaning is not fully understood, which made me think about crop circles. From Roman to Renaissance times, most labyrinths have traditionally been unicursal.

Labyrinths reached their most grand expression in the gothic cathedrals of northern France (Chartres, Reims, Amiens). These were magnificent pavement labyrinths set in the floor. Some believe pilgrims walked these paths…

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The Next Big Change_Increase Loving Life  That you might share most easily~!

Have you ever had a period in your life when you’ve daily celebrated loving your life?  And then, some circumstance or event arose of nowhere and you believed you might never be able to feel that way again?

It’s the lot of being human, I suppose, but having recently experienced that myself reminds me of the subjectivity talked about in the video and what a strong and miserable habit I’ve made of it.

To make the video more meaningful (and more easily shared as I just did with my sister a state away) you may want to take a look at the transcript.  It’s done by someone who’s first language is English (or their mastery of the language could fool me) and, thus, as close to perfect as I’ve ever seen.

The subject matter is, and has been, a top priority in my life.  Even so, I’ve been fooling myself and anyone who pays the least modicum of attention to me.  It’s largely a matter of not being able to draw my circle around me and gain the support I’ve managed to require.  Worse, I have managed to escape being very helpful to anyone else in this area as well.

I intend to take from this video and its transcript a review I can use, of my mental health, and learn to daily apply the mental/emotional hygiene habits suggested until my habits in caring for my mind are as well established as the ones for caring for my body.

I feel like cheering that I have found this.  I hope you like it as well.

Pixabay is my favorite site for obtaining images.  You see why in this post.

In Remembrance of One of Your Inner Gifts_Mindset

We can all take a moment and celebrate here.  We all have a mindset.  Thanks to all the lucky stars, we all have a mind.  I’ll bet you’ve thought more, mentioned more, been grateful more for your mind.  Which is good, of course; however when you look for success, the mindset (which happens to be under your total control — so long as you are conscious) is like wearing the right power suit.  It’s a must that it is you, and your intention, are either powering your boat or setting your sail.

First, a sort of heads up.  I was unaware of this until recently and you may be, too.  There are two types of mindsets.  The first is somewhat unformed.  It is the mindset any of us may have if we’ve never been drawn to think much about our mindset.  It’s a mindset of others about us and in us from our backgrounds.  The majority of us have this mindset the whole of our lives until some kind of tragedy, accident, major drama, or until we decide to make a major change having decided to go after a dream or special opportunity.  I consider it a default mindset.

The other is called a growth or incremental mindset, the mindset you want to have to have success changing your life from what is common and seems “natural” through generations in your family to the high tech, information overrun world found on the World Wide Web.  If you’re reading this on the internet, you likely have a strongly held opinion about your own mindset.  Can it be tested or found out by others in some way?

Carol S. Dweck, Ph.D., is one of the world’s leading researchers in the field of motivation and she has much to say about the two mindsets.


Self Confidence Makes Way for Openings and Opportunities

You should be cautioned, however, to learn the difference between Self-confidence, which is based upon sound knowledge of what you know and what you can do, and egotism, which is only based upon what you wish you knew or could do. Learn the difference between these two terms or you will make yourself boresome, ridiculous and annoying to people of culture and understanding. Self-confidence is something which should never be proclaimed or announced except through intelligent performance of
constructive deeds.                                                  Napoleon Hill

Sometimes, you may want to wonder if some people are born leaders or positive thinkers. NO. Being positive and staying positive is a choice. Building self esteem and drawing lines for self improvement is a choice, not a rule or a talent.                                David Elefant writer on

Developing and maintaining self-confidence is strictly a job for the man or the woman one sees in the mirror.  And it may be the only aspect of yourself standing between you and success in your newest venture.

Napoleon Hill made it his life purpose to help men and women discover this to unveil the strengths and majesty each had within:

. . . what strength and power and possibility lie hidden in the mind of the man who has never discovered the value of Self-reliance. Then and there I made up my mind that I, too, would stand in front of that same looking-glass and point an accusing finger at myself for not having discovered the lesson which I had helped another to learn. I did stand before that same looking-glass, and as I did so I then and there fixed in my mind, as my definite purpose in life, the determination to help men and women discover the
forces that lie sleeping within them. The book you hold in your hands is evidence that my definite purpose is being carried out.  Napoleon Hill

The quotes I am sharing in this post are from Law of Success, an 1,100 + page tome Napoleon Hill wrote prior to Think and Grow Rich.  We are now following in it for the second time on our Monday through Friday Think and Grow Rich call 9AM Eastern on earlier to 6AM Eastern Pacific and Arizona which does not go on Daylight Savings Time.  Feel welcome to join us for the reading and Master Mind session at 712 432 0900 PIN 565762# or use the same pin to listen within 23 hours after at same phone, last four 0990.

One of the irreparable losses to the human race lies in the lack of knowledge that there is a definite method through which Self-confidence can be developed in any person of average intelligence. What an immeasurable loss to civilization that young men and women are not taught this known method of developing Self-confidence before they complete their schooling, for no one who lacks faith in himself is really educated in the proper sense of the term.                                             Napoleon Hill